


Roadtrip

by museaway



Category: Smallville
Genre: Established Relationship, Humor, M/M, PWP, happy!Clex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-04-02
Updated: 2004-04-02
Packaged: 2017-11-01 07:54:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/354032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/museaway/pseuds/museaway
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Um, Lex?  I think we're kinda lost."  Happy.  Hard R.  PWP-ish.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Roadtrip

_Yet another April Fools' present for the LJ crew. Thanks for being (seriously) so kind to me since my foray into this fandom. <3_

"Um, Lex? I think we're kinda lost." 

The billionaire didn't bother to open both eyes, peering out of his right one only and noting -- quite to his dissatisfaction -- that the car was, in fact, no longer moving. He was sure that when he'd closed his eyes forty minutes before, the car had been moving at considerable speed toward California, where he was determined to show Clark that even billionaires can voluntarily ride "It's a Small World" and be considered men. 

And Lex was a man. 

A man in a car that was no longer moving with a sheepish-looking green-eyed alien farmboy behind the wheel, but a man no _less_. 

And, yes, a part of him really was aching to see what Clark looked like in nothing but a pair of mouse ears, but who wouldn't? 

No one with any sanity, Lex reasoned. 

"Lost?" he asked, stretching out his arms and moving his wrists about in circles until the joints popped. 

"Um, yes. I think we blew out a tire, too." 

Lex opened his other eye and turned his face toward Clark. 

"What d'you mean, you _think_ we blew out a tire?" 

"Well," Clark said, rubbing a hand against his right cheek. "There was this big sound." 

"Big sound." 

"And the car kinda swerved to the right." 

"Swerved." 

If this was some sort of joke, Lex was _not_ amused. He slumped back in his seat and frowned heavily when he noticed something. The familiar sights of highway driving seemed, well, _missing_. Instead of the golden arches of a McDonald's rest stop or a seedy-looking trucker's lounge, Lex found himself looking out the passenger window at a naked forest with only a few hints of green smattered here and there and the occasional rusting pop can. 

Lex's frown deepened. Due to Clark's morbid directional skills, he was under strick instruction _not_ to leave the main highway under any circumstances, barring Armageddon. Lex assumed Clark had understood this perfectly seeing as he had, with his right hand raised, sworn this under penalty of no sex for three days. 

If this was the End of the World, there was a serious _lack_ of hellfire and brimstone. 

Lex was disappointed. 

Needless to say, he was also rather dismayed at the thought of having to hold up his end of the oath. 

"Why didn't you stay on the highway?" he snapped, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Clark squirmed beside him. 

"Well, there was this exit, and I thought it was the right one, and --" 

"Clark." Lex closed his eyes and brought his fingertips together in a peak before his face. "We're driving to California. We haven't even left Kansas yet." 

"Oh." Clark was quiet for a minute, then unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned over, placing a hand on Lex's thigh. "Well. Guess we should make the best of the situation." 

"You pulled over because you wanted to _jump_ me?" 

"Somehow I don't think that's a reason to get _upset_. It's not like you haven't pulled over on the way to Metropolis cause you wanted to blow me." 

"That's different." 

Clark frowned. "How's that different?" 

"I don't get _lost_!" 

"And I do?" 

"I seem to recall a certain roadtrip to San Antonio last year that resulted with a pitstop in Tucson." 

"It's not _my_ fault you fell asleep," Clark pouted. He slid the hand on Lex's leg closer to the bulge that was making itself more apparent by the second. "Plus," he whispered, licking at Lex's ear, "your cars are _really_ fun to drive." 

Lex shook his head but didn't push Clark's hand away. "You do remember the agreement were you to get off of the highway?" 

"You said no _sex_ ," Clark clarified, making good use of Lex's zipper, "which really isn't a very specific term. Therefore, if I don't consider a handjob 'sex,' it's not ruled out. And neither's this." 

Clark reached his other hand around the back of Lex's head and pulled their mouths together while his hand snaked inside Lex's silk boxers. At first, Lex meant to protest. He meant to push the hand away. He meant to say, "Clark, you broke the rule," but somehow, he couldn't bring himself to do it. Because Clark's hand was wrapped around his cock and doing things that should be _illegal_ and probably were, considering this was Kansas, which probably had rules against handjobs given by horny aliens on backroads in the middle of the afternoon. 

_Christ_ , this was hot. 

Lex bit at Clark's lips, harsh bites that did more damage to his own teeth than anything. Bit and licked and fucked that mouth with his tongue, shared spit and the taste of sleep. Clark gripped tighter, and Lex moaned. Arching his back, he came into Clark's hand with their foreheads pressed together. 

"What --" Lex panted "-- was that about?" 

Clark smiled against his mouth. "I just wanted to see if you'd bend your rules." 

"You know me far too well," Lex growled, attempting to conceal the grin plastered on his face. "And we should really get directions else we're never getting there tonight." 

"I was just kidding about being lost," Clark admitted, pulling away and straightening his collar. "The highway's back that way a couple miles." 

" _Why_ would you joke about that?" Lex asked, tugging at his zipper. 

"Check your calendar, Lex." 

"...my calendar?" 

"It's April first." 

Groaning, Lex let his head fall back against the seat. Beside him, Clark leaned against the steering column, laughing. 

"You win," Lex said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "And I suppose I can allow you a few more bouts of non-sex over the next few days." 

Grinning, Clark turned the keys over in his palm, tossed them once in the air and caught them. 

"We should probably find a gas station," he said, frowning and peering out the window. 

Lex quirked an eyebrow. "I thought you said we weren't really lost." 

"Oh, we're not. We really did blow out a tire, though." 


End file.
